Cultural Norm

So I was scrolling through my Facebook feed just now, seeking out anything to give me a more justifiable excuse for procrastinating on studying for finals and exams, when I came across something my friend shared:is facing several felony charges, including obstructing justice and tampering with evidence, as a result of a grand jury’s inquiry into a possible cover-up of the rape.

Facebook photo source

I liked the photo because I have actually wished for these kinds of things to happen in bookstores and toy stores since I was a child - someone else wished for the same thing!
And then I scrolled a little farther, intending to move on to the next photo or status to look at, but I glanced at the first comment on the photo my friend shared.

"Books don't get you drunk and impair your judgement!  Lol"

I thought, "oh my God, ugh," and moved on to Tumblr for more procrastination and this was at the top of my dashboard:

Tumblr post source

And the response that accompanied it was this:

"It’s sort of horrifying that we all know what they’re talking about without them really saying it.. that it’s become that much of a norm in our society that we just know."

 The user who typed that doesn't even name the topic of the post, but the topic is apparent.
"She was asking for it."
"She was flirting with him."
"Boys will be boys."
These phrases that are commonly linked with that-which-has-been-un-named: sexual assault and rape.

Now that I think about it, I even hear the word 'rape' in everyday conversation.  In high school, people used the word all the time, guys and girls alike.  "We totally raped [insert rival] at that game!" as an expression of domination.

"I raped that test," is a phrase that has become commonplace, connoting a sense of accomplishment. "You might 'rape' somebody you're playing against which means you won really easily against them," said Mike Angelli, a UMass student. (source)

Fortunately, I have yet to hear that word with those certain expressions here at Whitworth.

 Or when the Steubenville rape case was making national headlines, Michael McVey (the superintendent of schools in Steubenville, Ohio) claimed he stayed out of the whole ordeal.  The rape took place in mid-August last year. A few months later (November last year), Mr. McVey 'sat in a conference room down the hall from his office and said he knew none of the details' of the case (source - NYtimes.com).  Apparently, he had not "spoken with any of the students thought to be involved in the event because it didn't take place on school grounds or during the school year. Besides, he said, he usually let the football coach take care of that sort of thing.  Basically, he was saying, it was none of his business. So he stayed out of it" (source).  He said he definitely did hear of the rumors.
Here's something else I pulled from the NY Times article: "By holding adults accountable, prosecutors might persuade school administrators and coaches to make it their business to tell the police when they hear students or athletes have done something illegal. And maybe the police will be more diligent about investigating such complaints."
That superintendent is now facing several felony charges, including obstructing justice and tampering with evidence, as a result of a grand jury’s inquiry into a possible cover-up of the rape.
Among others within the Steubenville school district, an elementary school teacher and a wrestling coach are now indicted for failing to make reports on child abuse or neglect.  A former football coach is now indicted for allowing underage drinking and making false reports to public officials.  Even the school district’s director of information technology is now indicted on obstruction, perjury, and tampering charges.

Women are taught how to prevent rape from happening to them, or taught how to try to defend themselves if someone tries to force themselves upon them, even from a young age.  Don't go anywhere alone.  Carry pepper spray on you.  Don't be afraid to scream for help.  Use your keys as a weapon.  Don't wear that particular article of clothing; that's asking for trouble.  Don't drink too much, even if you're just with friends.
I, myself, told a few friends I was going to walk to Cornerstone from the HUB one night, to go to a worship event - Abba's Daughters.  All of them spoke up and suggested I bring a friend along or to ask one of our guy friends to come escort me over.

When a girl makes rape allegations (true or false), some questions that can be expected to come up are "How much did you drink?" or "What were you wearing?" or "Were you flirting with him?"
Or how about when a guy makes rape allegations that are true or false?  It is estimated that there are over 300,000 instances of prison rape a year - 5000 of these instances are estimated to be of female victims and the other 295,000 to be male (source).  This statistic is a prison statistic, and does not include statistics from the general population.
Even prison rape has become a normal thing to joke about.  "Don't drop the soap!"  "Clench those butt cheeks!"

We're teaching people to prevent rape.  I, at this point in time, cannot confidently say that we're also teaching people to just not rape.